But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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