I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
