I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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