I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Text me some of your sweat
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
