ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
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