drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Non-Jews are for practice
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Floor bacon is actually really good
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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