just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
