she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
