Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
