North Korea, Best Korea!
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Randomize
