yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
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it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
