fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
