No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
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Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
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Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue