I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
