Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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