Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
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The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
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youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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