I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
