"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
