Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
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