Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
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