the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Randomize
