that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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