Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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