We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
