I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.