idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Randomize