I can tuck mytits in my pants
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
