Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
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I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
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Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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