your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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