Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I just found a bag of teeth...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
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