Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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