how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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