You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
