He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
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