dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
He told me they were just razor bumps!
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I need water and some morals