my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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