I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Randomize
