I'm eating all of the evidence.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize