Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Randomize
