Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
