Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
