Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
we're chasing vodka with high fives
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
