Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
i dont even know how to be here
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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