her vagine was all disorganized.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
