I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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