i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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