So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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