Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize