I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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