AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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