Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Randomize
